Relational Trauma

Relational Anxiety Is Real. And We Can Help.

Healing Relational Trauma & Relational Anxiety

Understanding Relational Anxiety



Our mission is simple – we want you to experience fear in a new way. It does not have to run the show – or your relationships.

We’re a private practice and we strive to deliver premium counseling services. Your privacy is our primary concern.

As you’re exploring the site, please keep in mind, you don’t need “a reason” to schedule. If you believe you would benefit from talking to another adult, privately and confidentially, about what’s happening in your life, that’s enough.


Relational anxiety is often unrecognized in the healing process. Quick, but unhelpful solutions, are commonly offered. These solutions are temporary and people find themselves caught up in the same relational pattern over and over again. Why should you apply real solutions? It’s worth the work! Relational patterns (or anxiousness in connection) will have a layered impact on a person’s life. It impacts four primary areas:

  • Emotional trust, depth, and intimacy.
  • Response to conflict.
  • Expectations for relationships.
  • The ability to understand emotions.


We provide counseling services for three areas of relational anxiety.



The first type of relational counseling we offer is referred to as relational anxiety or relational trauma counseling.

Because, sometimes it isn’t an anxiety disorder, it’s relational anxiety. With optimal mental health, we trust our relationships and make wise decisions about our relationships. However, based on various factors, relationally traumatized individuals often feel as if they are responding to a current relationship based on past experience. Examples of relational trauma:

  • generational trauma
  • childhood neglect or abuse
  • childhood or adult bullying
  • social exclusion
  • social rejection
  • sibling to sibling abuse or violence
  • abrupt loss or change in a relationship
  • a relational betrayal of any type
  • abuse of power from an employer, partner, or system
  • being used or harmed in a trusted relationship
  • victim of slander or character attacks
  • employment termination regardless of the cause
  • any intentional act to use a person as a resource, causing harm
  • a confusing or manipulative sexual experience
  • emotional, physical, or sexual abuse or violence

Provider, Erin Hagen, helps people heal from relational trauma, and improve interpersonal boundaries. She offers somatic and EMDR to heal sensory hyper-reaction.

You will learn skills to strengthen communication and build (or re-build) trust in yourself and others.



The second type of relational counseling we offer is for parents experiencing anxiety about the parent-child relationship. Do you ever worry that you’re not doing enough to help your child? This can be a common, obsessive worry. When our children are suffering, it can consume every thought. It’s okay, Parents. We get it.

We provide services to adults, and we love helping anxious parents with anxious kids! We can help moms and dads break the worry cycle and begin modeling for independent and courageous children.

Provider, Erin Hagen, specializes in working with parents to bring both structure, and carefree-play back into the home. An increasing number of children are struggling with anxiety conditions these days. It’s very difficult to help our kids activate new learning if we, as parents, are stuck in an anxious cycle.

Relational Trauma North Dakota

All services in the Relational Health & Anxiety Program are private-pay services. What is the difference between a private-pay service and clinical service? Private-pay services do not include a clinical/medical evaluation. Insurance companies do not reimburse for non-medical services. If using insurance, click here to learn more about clinical care.

Relational-Counseling Rates:

Intake Appointment/50 minutes: $150.00

Return Appointment/45 minutes: $130.00

Extended Sessions: $2.40 Minute

Please call or email if you have any questions.




Relational trauma feels like you’re hypervigilant to a past traumatic relational experience. Trauma is something from the past – playing out in the now. As if the mind has not fully integrated the experience.
Anxious attachment is a pattern of getting your relational needs met – or the way you expect others to respond to your emotional needs in a relationship. People can use hyperactivating strategies in order to maintain a relational connection. Typically, anxious-attachment comes from the belief that you’re unworthy of love.
Avoidant attachment often comes from the belief that others will not catch you – they will not be responsive to your needs in the way you want.




The third type of relational counseling we offer is for adults anxious about being loved or loving well.

Erin Hagen works with men and women raised in homes with parental hostility, emotional neglect, or even “normal” loving homes. Attachment anxiety can happen for a variety of reasons.

Your early experiences don’t stop impacting you once you reach adulthood. New patterns must be learned and experienced. 

Indicators of anxious attachment:

  • Fearing rejection and/or of separation in your relationships
  • Emotionally triggered by rejection, coldness, and the experience of being the scapegoat
  • Fearful of closeness with your female partner
  • Worry-related thoughts about the relationship 
  • Preoccupation with thinking about your relationship
  • Worsening of symptoms related to anxiety or depression, when thinking about your relationships
  • Fears about the loss of a relationship 
  • Attempt to retain a partner (examples are monopolizing time, emotional manipulation, concerns with self or other appearance, frequent checking on the status of the relationship) 

Anxious attachment can harm personal development and growth- as often, these thoughts are consuming, and other areas of life are neglected. 


Learning self-compassion and connection. Erin can help you learn how to hold yourself (and your needs) without fear. 

Learn non-anxious or non-avoidant attachment patterns that will benefit your friendships, family, and romantic connections.

At CLCEC, we practice new experiences with patients. We don’t practice “bandaid” techniques. We practice real change and solutions. 

All counselors and providers at CLCEC offer personal counseling services, which is a private-pay service. Private-pay offers the highest level of privacy.

Meet CLCEC’s counselors.